Rediscovering Gratitude

It's been quite a while since I've posted, and I think that's because I've been struggling to find gratitude lately. I sat down a couple of times in the past few days, intending to write, and came up with a surprising lack of words. The few things I did manage to come up with didn't seem worthwhile to post.... which I now realize is totally opposite of the entire point of this blog. Everything is worthwhile in it's own right and any and all gratitude should be acknowledged and shared. I'm making a mental note to remember that in the future.

Anyway. As you all know, I work in the wonderful world of retail. And seeing as we've reached the end of the countdown to Christmas, you can imagine how work has consumed my life for the last couple of weeks. I have to be honest and say that I've found it really difficult to feel gracious when pulling extra long shifts every day and dealing with grumpy customers, screaming children, broken cash registers, more grumpy customers, all the noise, and just the general chaos that is the mall two weeks before Christmas. With all the work I've been doing, I feel like I haven't had a chance to actually enjoy this holiday season and everything it brings - the family time, the magical settings, the spread of love, joy, giving, and gratitude. Instead I've just felt tired and over it all, dreading waking up in the morning because it means I have to do it all over again.

This is not how I want to experience Christmas.

When I settled into my couch this evening after another long work day, I suddenly felt lighter and brighter. Sure, I was still tired. But I reminded myself that tomorrow is Christmas Eve, I don't have to work, and the following day is Christmas! Why spend another night reflecting on all of the frustrations of today when I can embrace the two awesome days ahead? I'm letting go of all of my stress, anger, and exhaustion and starting totally fresh tomorrow morning.

Tonight I'm grateful to have finished my last shift of the holiday retail season and I'm even more grateful for having two days to relax, have some fun, and rediscover that awesome feeling of having an open, grateful heart.